Be nicer to yourself. For real, don’t be so hard on yourself when you mess up—especially when you’re just trying to do better.
I was talking to my dad about this the other day. We play video games a lot, sometimes Madden Football. Here’s something I noticed: When we’re playing, and he’s the quarterback, he’ll rush me, and I’ll feel the pressure. I start panicking, and before I know it, I’ve thrown an interception. Naturally, I’ll think, “Man, I need to get better at this. I’ve got to stay patient under pressure.”
So, next possession, I focus on being calm. He rushes me again, but this time, I don’t panic. I see the obstacles coming, but instead of making a bad throw, I get sacked.
Now, it would be easy to beat myself up again, thinking, “What’s wrong with me?” But here’s the thing—I was patient this time. That’s a win! It’s important to acknowledge those small gains, even when the outcome you wanted isn’t perfect.
Give yourself credit for accomplishing the one thing you set out to improve, even if the result isn’t flawless. Celebrate that progress before moving on to face the next obstacle.
Sure, constructive criticism has its place; it’s how we grow. But you don’t need to jump straight into tearing yourself down every time you make a mistake. Start by being kind to yourself first.
